Vegas

Today I had to say goodbye to Vegas. Those of you who aren’t pet or animal lovers may never understand how painful it is to lose a furry member of your family, but let me assure you that the pain is real. He was very ill and we had to make the decision to allow him to die with people he loved and trusted holding him rather than linger in pain and possibly die alone and frightened.

My mother sent me the following poem …

A Dog’s Plea

by Anonymous

Treat me kindly, my beloved friend, for no
heart in all the world is more grateful for
kindness than the loving heart of me.
Do not break my spirit with a stick, for
though I might lick your hand between blows,
your patience and understanding will more
quickly teach me the things you would have
me learn.  Speak to me often, for your voice
is the world’s sweetest music, as you must
know by the fierce wagging of my tail when
your footsteps fall upon my waiting ear.
Please take me inside when it is cold and
wet, for I am a domesticated animal, no
longer accustomed to bitter elements.
I ask no greater glory than the privilege of
sitting at your feet beside the hearth.  Keep
my pan filled with fresh water, for I cannot
tell you when I suffer thirst.  Feed me
clean food that I may stay well, to romp
and play and do your bidding, to walk by your
side, and stand ready, willing and able to
protect you with my life, should your life
be in danger.  And, my friend, when I am
very old, and I no longer enjoy good health,
hearing and sight, do not make heroic efforts
to keep me going.  I am not having any fun.
Please see that my trusting life is taken
gently, I shall leave this earth knowing with
the last breath I draw that my fate was always
safest in your hands.

This is what we did for my best friend today. Holding him as he died and living without him was and is painful, but if this was the price for ten years with a loyal, faithful, and loving companion it was gladly paid. Goodbye, old friend, and rest well.

This year I am celebrating my 20th annual attendance of Dragon*Con.

It is absolutely incredible to be able to say that I’ve been doing anything for twenty years. But the crazy celebration of fandom in all forms—featuring everything from Storm Troopers to former porn stars—begins this weekend in Atlanta. I went from having my Dad drive me down and sleeping on the floors of friends’ rooms, spending all my money on game tickets and eating only in the Con Suite, to helping people run their booths, to eventually being invited as a guest in my own right. Say what you want about Dragon*Con, but it’s never dull!

This year I don’t have a booth or dealer table of my own, though my “home base” is that of my friend, artist, and collaborator Lindsay Archer — who is in turn part of the Larry Elmore “island of artists” in the main exhibit hall. If you’re trying to find me and want to leave word, stop over there! I’m also speaking on the following panels:

Indie RPGs!
Time: Fri 05:30 pm Location: Grand Salon B – Hilton (1 Hour)
Description: Beyond the d20! Our panel on the revolution going on in the role-playing industry. Vive la difference!

Sci-Fi RPGs
Time: Sat 07:00 pm Location: Grand Salon B – Hilton (1 Hour)
Description: A panel on the wonderfully diverse realm of science fiction gaming. Everything from Shadowrun to Fading Suns to Eclipse Phase.

Indie RPGs!
Time: Sun 01:00 pm Location: Grand Salon B – Hilton (1 Hour)
Description: Go beyond the d20! We talk to cutting edge designers about some of the more innovative games that are on the market today.

The Mechanics of Designing Your Own RPG
Time: Sun 07:00 pm Location: Grand Salon B – Hilton (1 Hour)
Description: Designing your own RPG? Ever wanted to give it a shot? What are the mechanics that give you hang ups? Award-winning designers reveal how they do it.

You can also find me on the lobby level of the Hilton at least sometime in the evenings (Friday night through Sunday night) for karaoke hosted by my friend Jeremy and Sho Nuff Entertainment. (Look for me to post embarrassing videos from YouTube sometime next week …) I’ll be doing impromptu game demos for the upcoming products of in the Open Gaming area and other locations — posting updates as I can to help folks find me.

Twitter-followers will be annoyed by my updates using the #dragoncon hashtag. Smartphone users can download a sweet app to stay on top of the schedule!

I hope to meet up with many of you at the convention. NOW GET OFF MY LAWN!!

Jamie’s Healthsome Morning Cookies

TEAM SUGAR & FAT

1 cup butter-flavored shortening
1 cup crunchy peanut butter
3/4 table sugar
3/4 brown sugar (firmly packed)
2 eggs

TEAM DRY

1 1/2 cups AP flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon cinnamon

BITS & PIECES

1 3/4 cups rolled oats
1 1/4 cups golden raisins (or other small dried fruit)
1 medium green apple, finely grated, include juice
1/3 cup carrot, finely grated
1/4 cup coconut flakes

INSTRUCTIONS

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Be prepared to scrape down the sides of the bowl a number of times during mixing.

Cream the Sugar & Fat team thoroughly, mixing in the eggs last after the sugar and shortening have been well-combined. Combine the Dry ingredients thoroughly and then slow mix in on low speed until completely integrated. Stir in the bits and pieces. Use a 1 tablespoon cookie disher to portion 1-dozen per sheet. Bake for about 10 minutes, rotating halfway. Cool on sheets for 2 minutes before transfering to cooling racks.

Jamie’s Note: Both the finished cookies and portioned dough can freeze for months. (Just bake the frozen cookie dough as normal, adding a few minutes to total baking time.) Enjoy as breakfast or a somewhat healthsome snack!

Jamie's Healthsome Morning Cookies

Know, O prince, that between the years when Hootie and the Blowfish first toured among the gleaming cities, and the years of the rise of the Zombie Apocalypse, there was an Age undreamed of, when people of all walks of life shared status updates through various social networks – Twitter, Facebook, Buzz, Google+ with its strange “circles” of spider-haunted mystery, and Myspace which had become a shadow-guarded tomb. But the proudest news-sharing sites of the world were the author-hosted websites and blogs, reigning supreme in both word count and unchecked ego.

Hither came Jamie the Atlantan, brown-haired, green-eyed, iPhone in hand, a geek, a gamer, a writer, with gigantic vocabulary and gigantic hard drive, to tread the Internet under his sandalled feet.

* * *

Some of you may recall my strong love of the character Conan the Cimmerian, especially as written by his creator, Robert E. Howard. It was the first “adult” sword-and-sorcery property to which I was exposed, the first multi-media tales that came my way — for me, at least, as a film first and then the paperback collections of Conan stories. I strongly associate Conan with the memory of my father, who took me to see the original John Milius-directed film when I was truthfully far too young to see decapitations, giant snakes, and orgies, who gave me all of his old Conan books to read when I was roughly the same age my son Alexander is now. After my father passed away in 2008 I re-read all the original Conan stories in restored editions in the order they were originally written. So when news came of a new Conan movie, I was both excited and worried. Would it suck? Would it be more true to the character as originally conceived?

And … I still don’t know. I haven’t seen it yet. But I most definitely will be checking it out. I also will be reading the film’s novelization written by my friend and colleague Michael Stackpole. (Being able to call Mike either of those things still astonishes me when I take a step back and think about it, but more on that in a moment.) I know that he has an appreciation for Howard that goes back many more years than mine, and I know he works in shared universes with great care and always tries to respect the vision of the original creators. It will be fun to see how he worked from the script but adapted it with his brain and the original Howard tales hanging out in the back of his mind.

I’m also really happy that his work on the novelization gave him a fun and rare opportunity, the chance to attend a Hollywood film premiere. And in a surprising twist, this is where I suddenly had a small role to play in Mike’s Conan adventures. When all was said and done, Mr. Stackpole had this to say on his Twitter feed:

I’ll let you read Mike’s far more entertaining story of the Conan novelization and film premiere over on his website, and you can read about my small role in his evening out in Tinseltown in Part Three. In short, Mike found himself in need of a Plus One and called me to help him find a companion for the evening who would appreciate going with him to see a film like Conan and might also enjoy the opportunity to engage in the socializing and networking aspect of attending a film premiere. Mike was understandably pleased that he was able to attend the premiere with Team Unicorn‘s Milynn Sarley, and I’m both happy and jealous of both the event itself and his awesome date for the evening.

But while it’s an awesome ego boost to be called a “genius” by someone you like and greatly admire, here’s why it’s both ironic and funny.

Flashback to 1994. I’m nineteen years old, at the end of a summer break following my first year of college. I spent that summer as a lifeguard and had a deep bronze tan, an amazing swimmer’s physique (boy how I miss that!), and hair turned bleach-blond by the sun and chlorine. I am a wide-eyed Georgia-boy who just happens to be a gamer-geek, sits as president of an RPGA gaming club, and is a wannabe genre fiction author. And, for the very first time, I’m attending the Gen Con Game Fair in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

Amongst my full agenda of gaming and nerdery, I attend the writing workshop of one Michael Stackpole. I am there to learn and I scribble down notes and try to soak up the successful author’s wisdom and advice. But being, well, me … I can’t keep my mouth shut for the entire seminar.

At one point our instructor declares there are three rules that genre writers should never break if we don’t want our stories to fall apart or otherwise suck. (Since this was approximately a million years ago I have no idea what these rules are — sorry!) Remembering a book series I’ve recently read again for at least the third time, I raise my hand. “Mr. Stackpole, in Roger Zelazny’s Chronicles of Amber novels he breaks pretty much all of the rules you just mentioned. More than once, in fact.” I can only imagine later that I looked like an overtanned California surfer dude but speak with a mild southern accent.

Michael Stackpole, best-selling author, simply looks down at me and says, “That’s because Roger Zelazny is a genius … and you’re not.” Appropriately chastised, I keep my mouth shut for the rest of the presentation.

Well, it took me seventeen years, but I finally managed to convince Mike Stackpole to publicly state that I am, in fact, a genius. I play a long game … but I play to win!

In this case, I started with an existing recipe for Cranberry-Orange muffins that used standard dried cranberries, but I wanted to rehydrate them in orange juice to up the orange-flavor ante. I also wanted to use yogurt instead of sour cream … since that’s what I had on-hand. The switch also meant changing the baking powder/soda proportions to make sure the muffins leavened properly. Baking is part chemistry, after all.

The results were tasty! For those interested in trying this one yourself … (If you notice language similarity between myself and Alton Brown, that’s probably because he’s my patron saint of cooking and baking.)

Jamie’s Cranberry-Orange Muffins

 Team Dry:

2 cups AP flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt

Team Wet:

1 egg
1 cup sugar
1 teaspoon finely grated orange zest
1/4 cup (1/2 stick) unsalted butter, melted & slightly cooled
1 cup yogurt

Bits & Pieces:

3/4 cup rehydrated cranberries (dried cranberries that have been rehydrated by simmering 10 minutes in orange juice)

Directions:

Heat oven to 375 degrees and prep muffin tins either with Baker’s Joy or paper liners.

Combine the dry ingredients, then combine the wet team one ingredient at a time whisking vigorously (and drizzling the butter slowly). Assemble via the muffin method (pour the wet on top of the dry, stir with spatula or wooden spoon only enough to combine — DO NOT OVERMIX). Fold in the berries, and use a large disher (ice cream scoop) to evenly portion.

Bake for 18-20 minutes, rotating the tins halfway through cooking. Test with a toothpick and cool upside down on a kitchen towel to prevent soggy bottoms. Once cooled, store in a sealed container for a week or store in the freezer for months!

Cranberry-Orange Muffins

(Jamie’s Note: I’m going to play with the leavening next time I try these. They didn’t puff up as much as I prefer in my muffins. But no complaints on flavor or texture. You could also sprinkle sugar on the top if you wanted that coffee-shop look and sweeter first bite.)

I made it home late last night from San Diego Comic-Con, and desperately wish I was asleep right now. I can’t give any kind of sensible recap. Despite stress and unexpected challenges, I had a lot of fun and bunch of amazing moments. Next year will be a very different show, but I’ll most certainly be back! A few moments worth mentioning:

• My friend Chuck going out of his way to rescue me from the airport and then take back on Monday. He is a class act all around, and thanks to Lindsay Archer for introducing me to him!
• Natalie the (apparently) psychic bartender at The Marble Room, who somehow guessed at who one of my friends was with zero contextual clues to help her and without me doing a thing other than order a drink. (Dirty vodka martini with bleu-cheese stuffed olives. Yum.)
• Dinner and drinks with Pat Kapera of Crafty Games, in which the psychic (and possibly evil) aforementioned Natalie perhaps over-served us a wee bit.
• Bacon
• Traditional pre-Comic-Con rant and nervous breakdown with Felicia Day, my fantastic time with The Guild booth staff (hi Brian! Denise! Sophia!), and our also-traditional farewell dinner that included Kim Evey, Greg Benson, my editor Leah Wilson, and other cool people that I won’t shamelessly name-drop here. While stressful at the time, I’m tickled that Fox apparently complained that the signing line for The Guild was interfering with theirs for Glee.
• My box of product that game in nearly two days late—all 61 pounds of which I had to carry by my lonesome nine blocks down 5th Avenue with a 125,000 geeks in my way. My back still hurts. Anyone want to give me a massage or really good drugs?
• Unexpected and awesome gifts from some of my favorite authors—Talent Pipes from Pat Rothfuss and a copy of Ghost Story from Jim Butcher.
• Bacon burger (thank you, Natalie!).
• Turning around in my own booth to realize I was sitting right next to childhood crush Erin Gray (Buck Rogers, Silver Spoons) and had a fun chat.
• Hanging with Mike Dougherty, fierce hugs from Heather Fagan (director and star of Browncoats Redemption, respectively—get a copy!), and seeing my favorite Browncoats down on the other end of the hall.
• Hanging out with my artist friend Joie Brown, then learning all the embarrassing things I apparently said and did after being over-served by the psychic, evil, and insidious Natalie (see above) while at an “industry” party.
• Several random celebrity encounters while working my table at the booth.
• Bacon sandwich. (Thank you Kim!)
• Grabbing unexpected and fun presents for my family and special people in my life.
• Randomly running into Chris Clark and Jason Engle at the airport before the flight out. And the crotchety old bastard who refused to switch seats so two friends could sit with each other on the flight to Phoenix.

Wow, there is way more. But I have to stop somewhere. Maybe I’ll write up a proper recap later. But probably not because I don’t have time. It was awesome, everyone was awesome, and if you were not mentioned here I apologize. My brain is mushy today. (Except you, Lydia, you get an extra-special mention for being awesome in every way and helping make sure I had a place to stay after the hotel fiasco.) I need coffee. And perhaps more bacon.

Jamie & The Guild (SDCC 2011)

Gen Con, No Dice

I’m very, very sad and almost reluctant to report that I will not be attending Gen Con 2011 in any capacity whatsoever. The company I was going to work with this year was not able to obtain booth space (which I’ve heard a lot of strange grumbling about from exhibitors both attending and not this year, I must be way out of the loop). With family obligations and work deadlines and some big life changes in the works it just feels like the universe is telling me to sit this one out. (I know, you’re used to me being the one to say “f–k the universe, I’m goin’ to Gen Con!” but I gotta wear my big boy pants this time and stay home, take care of business.) I first attended the show in 1994, and hoped to make it a complete clean sweet to 2014 to celebrate 20 years of epic nerdery.

I will I be back next year? Count on it.

Enter the Dragon*Con

So my next actual convention appearance will be Dragon*Con, my hometown show, and one I’ve been attending for *cough*twenty*cough* years. To celebrate me being old enough to say that I’ve been doing anything for twenty years, I will be speaking on panels, hanging with friends, demoing games in the Open Game area, and consuming enough alcohol to temporarily erase the pain of my advanced years. (Only for it to return—and worse—the next day. But we can’t have everything, can we?) I’ll post my panel schedule once they give it to me (i.e. I show up and get my badge).

One place you can usually find me is on the lobby level of the Hilton for karaoke run by my buddy Jeremy and Sho Nuff Entertainment. We’ll be having a great time on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night. And who knows? Felicia Day and I might reprise our epic duet from 2009. (No promises, though, she’s a busy girl!) No dealer table this year, though if someone wants to buy anything from me personally I’ll have a few things on hand. Come and find me! Say hi! Play a game, sing a song, or have a drink!

In October the convention thing gets going again with two shows back-to-back. Stay tuned!

Luggage Photo Courtesy of geishaboy500 Flickr Creative Commons

Committing my daily sin of posting social networking updates on sometimes-mundane observations, I placed the following update on Twitter: ”This morning’s lobby muzak: ‘Time in a Bottle’ by Jim Croce. Maybe I’ll sing that at karaoke tonight …”

It was only minutes later that I received a reply from @jimcroce, suggesting that I post a video! It was less surprising than you might think, considering I’ve been followed by cartoon characters, Voldemort, and the Ghost of Edgar Allan Poe. In this case, the account turned out to be the official fan site for the much-missed Mr. Croce.

“Time In a Bottle,” for anyone who isn’t familiar, is a haunting love song from Jim Croce’s first album and was written for his son. After his death in a plane crash two years before I was born, “Time In a Bottle” became the Number One song on Billboard’s Hot 100 list. I have been a huge fan of the singer-songwriter’s work since the mid-1980s, when after hearing some of the songs played at a local water park I got a tape of Croce’s greatest hits.

Except for in the shower or behind the wheel I had never sang “Time in a Bottle” before last night, but since @jimcroce asked specifically I decided to sing it and record it for all the world to see. I went to Sidelines Grille in Canton, where every Thursday night my friend Tommy Cage hosts a great evening of karaoke. My buddy Derek shot the videoand, well, here it is.

One of the great things about art of any kind—be it the written word, motion pictures, paintings, music, or even games—is that it can live on and grant the creator a certain kind of immortality. Jim Croce passed on before I was even born, yet I’m able to enjoy his music and get a sense of the man from the parts of himself that he shared with us through his work.

Jim Croce (1943 – 1973)

As a creative professional who believes that artists of all kinds (be they musicians, writers, or game designers) should be paid for the work they do, that they own their creations and should be allowed to protect that ownership. However, with every new piece of legislation there is the law of unintended consequences and there is definitely some of that going on here.

If someone directly redistributes copyrighted material, that is a direct and obvious violation of the law with the same level of consequences as other forms of theft. The way should be made easy for copyright holders to receive fair civil damages from those who do so. I believe that individuals or companies that knowingly assist in the redistribution of copyrighted material should also face both civil and criminal penalties. (I say knowingly very specifically, for example a web hosting company that has been informed that a user has put up pirated songs, novels, etc. on his website.) These are cut and dry cases of bootlegging, where someone has stolen something either to sell or give it away.

Beyond the above is where the good intentions are paving the road to hell. And because technology moves far faster than either our legislative or legal systems, we can’t anticipate how a law might be applied to something that hasn’t even been invented yet.

If someone takes a game I wrote and makes a new character sheet for it and posts it on his website, that derivative work is technically a violation. If a young woman posts a YouTube video of herself dancing to a song playing on the radio, that is a violation. If a man reads a chapter of his favorite book on his podcast, that is also a violation. When we start suing our own customers and locking them in jail I believe we’ve gone off the reservation.

This is tricky stuff, for sure, but I’d like to see common sense rule the day. (Ha!) Let’s punish direct piracy and acts that obviously impact the sale of a copyrighted item. Let’s especially sue and prosecute people who make money off of stolen property. But let’s not take it too far and begin locking up the people who love our creations so much they are using them in their forms of self-expression.

This legislation as it is written is broken and it needs to be fixed.

Later that evening, after I’d had a couple of drinks, Emilie showed up and took me up on it. Who was I to refuse? Her choice (out of a limited number of duet choices in the song book) was “Picture,” in the style of Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow—a pop-country song that tells the story of two heartbroken ex-lovers who reunite at the conclusion. If I look stiff in the video, it’s because (A) I usually just stand up and sing at karaoke, rather than give a whole-body performance taking up half the room, and (B) the words were projected up on the wall and I didn’t know the song very well.

It was a fun moment, and apparently made an impression because ever other person who came to my table was talking about it on Sunday.

This actually isn’t my first time doing a karaoke duet with an actress! See my cartoon love ballad with Felicia Day if you need another laugh today.

A Pair With No Shame